I had a realy bad confidence knocking lesson today on Hälge😢
I just felt like it couldnt ride because in the trot he was Kinda fast and i dont realy know if i had my stirrups to shorts but i was like getting flinged out of the saddle like the whole time when we were troting.
Also i have a realy bad riding season right now so from like december when a horse bucked with me and now im just realy scared all the time and nervous every time my coach tells me its time to canter and this was defenetly not my worst lesson mentaly but It was defenetly one of my worse and like i just couldnt get him to canter even how hard i tried.
When we were walking of the horses i just didnt want to stay because I wanted to canter so badly on Hälge but I ran out of time and wasnt able to canter so I just broke downin tears...
I had held it in for a long time but I just felt like i couldnt hold in my feelings anymore so I just started crying right then and there.
Im just so embarressed for not being able to canter when everyone else did but now after im a litle better but I dont realy know if I want to ride Hälge anymore because I Kinda hate him right now but well see next week what I will do.
This was even worse mentaly then when I fell off him on my jumping lesson about two weeks ago because then I said I could never hate him or be angry at him but I dont know what changed.
Anyways this has been a very long post so here are some pictures
The two first pictures are of Hälge then the third one is of Love just trying to get my attention when i was getting Hälge ready and the last picture is of the smallest horse in the stables Elliot smiling(i dont know how high he is but hes a Welch Mountain)
Dw!!! Everyone has bad days and good days I’ve had a few times like that after one of my comps it was a couple weeks and I wanted to go bareback so I did but I kept slipping everywhere so I had to put a saddle on and ended up doing a horrible trot where I was just not able to do it and I struggled with everything we did that day and I just wanted to cry because I felt like I was ruining sunny and not doing anything correct wich sucked so bad but in the end I just ended up standing there brushing sunny and hugging him before eputting him away wich helped a bit but the next lesson went a lot better when I was at my old barn i was basically told she couldn’t give me lessons anymore because I kept getting frustrated and getting off and crying but I took a year or less break and found a new place wich is with sunny and I’m doing a lot better because my new instructor is a agriculture teacher so she actually knows how to teach and coach especially when I’m frustrated and confused don’t give up some days are bad but you will end up have much better ones soon I promise next time maybe try I different horse that could help you with your confidence maybe an older one that is still rideable or just a calmer one just don’t give up ! 🫶
Sorry that was a long paragraph
Thunder_hh its fine but just so you know i cant take an older horse because Hälge is the oldest horse in the stable that is 23 years old and born in 2003
♡~{Kht Månsken}~♡ that’s alright! Maybe ask about a calmer horse unless there isn’t or keep trying on hälge I promise it gets better don’t give up :)
